It’s an illusion to think that anyone has it all together. No one does. Yet, all of us seek to find out what makes the successful people or programs exactly that — successful. We hope to find a one strategy, plan or program that we can take and imitate in our own work areas or lives. Then, we will have solved all of our issues and troubles.
It doesn’t work that way.
I’ve spent so much on books about business strategy, marketing, money management, music, computers, teaching gurus, and life management. I’ve learned a great deal from the insights of others. But, in the end, I’m convinced that success boils down to connecting and fostering relationships with those people to whom God has entrusted you.
Success is helping people to care, connect to one another and be loved.
You can steal ideas all you want. It still is essential that you help connect those around you. It isn’t about making them all happy because you can never do that. It isn’t all about respect. I’ve met plenty of people I respected but never wanted to hang out with them on a regular basis. It isn’t about talent. Certainly, we all know people who are talented but couldn’t relate to the people around them.
Above all, I have to get them to care?
Yep, you do. The successful leader takes the healthy, calm person who sits with the talented but uncooperative person, who stands next to the boastful, over-confident human, while watching the meek, mild wallflower, who lives next door to the grumpy, but dear-hearted guy and help them care about each other. If they care, the idiosyncrasies that we all have will matter as much.
Yes, it’s much easier to let the hard-to-deal-with go. But, that isn’t our calling.
Love those that are toxic, too. Find where they can serve, be healed, and be cared for. Quarantine them if you have to. And, realize that it may not be serving with you. But, you never know, it may be, too, so don’t give up. Expect them to hate it. Expect them to fight it. Expect them to act out. Call them on it. But, get them loved.
Expect some to leave. Some can’t handle being loved or that you’d care about those hard to love. Some don’t like tension and run away. Sometimes none of it will work. But, do all you can to have them connect and care about one another.
Expect the healthy to care for and about the unhealthy. This may be harder than you think.
And, oh yeah, be talented, make the right decisions, and be inspirational, too. But, above all, help those around you to care. Because, in the end, we are all the undeserving, unloveable, idiosyncratic, grumpy, dear-hearted, toxic wallflower. And, God loves us.
Help them to care, connect, and be loved.